Time to get up close and personal.  I was left incontinent the last time I had cancer and many times have had uncontrollable diarrhea.  I think with really heavy periods that spill on white chairs in restaurants and floors of male friends’ offices (past memory) this is about as down and dirty as it gets.

WHY can we not go to the disability people and get a card for our car that says ‘disabled’  so that we can park quickly and get to a loo  (bathroom).  Most of my worst attacks happened when I was anxious and alone trying to park or trying to find a loo in a big store OR worse being refused the use of one.  I think I know every bathroom in my neighborhood.  Starbucks rates high but I have some secret ones.  When they got frequent I wore that awful paper diaper underwear.  I got tired of throwing out everything I had on.  They put patterns on diapers now. Why can’t they make these paper underwear things more attractive?

Incontinence is more usual.  No one seems to want to talk about it.  Horrible: either you wear a pad or go around wet.  Any pride or face saving is long gone.  I have a collection of heavy trousers and coats cover it all.

Fortunately I’m having a respite from this but I think it is worth complaining about.

Here’s is what would make it easier;

1. Disability badges for parking. Problem of course, when you tear out of your car and run to the loo, people look at you and think, ‘where’s the limp, the crutch, the wheelchair?’
2. More women’s loos in stores.
3. Boutiques that have loos.
4. Department stores with women’s loos on every floor.
5. Theatres with more stalls
6. Movie houses where you don’t have to walk flights of steps and floors to get to loos.
7. Some amazing invention, which would let you pee in your car in traffic.
8. Abolishment of all plays over 1 1/2 hours without intermission.  (The average bladder needs empting in 1 1/2 hours not two) (Have you seen the average age of theatre audiences…not 25 I can assure you)

I have some prescription pills that I take in emergencies.  They are given to children who have trouble with bladder control.  I call them my Wagner Pills and take them when I go to long operas.  You can actually go four hours without peeing.  Miracle.  I treasure them.  Also take them in countries when I traveled that had squats or toilets.